The Zombie Mice are coming!

Hello all!
*Crickets*
Bob has realized something. He has not told y'all* about his theories! How stupid of him. Over the years Bob's brain has developed a tendency to take any simple little thing and form strange conspiracy theories around it. Two examples I have already quoted from myself in previous posts, these are my two favorites.

Theory 1:
Micky Mouse, the beloved children's character created by The Father Of All Evil Walt Disney will, in the near future, draft children and adults alike into the army. It will come quickly, everyone in the government, having been kidnaped and brainwashed by the Disney Empire, will all agree to a new law that will allow children to be drafted into the army. And so without warning or reason children and adults alike will fall victem to It. And so the harvest begins. Adults under forty will be drafted by the army's newest recruiter Mickey Mouse. I say people under thirty because, in a few years, all of those will have grown up in Mousedom, or the world of children today (I mean look at little kids, if you ask them to go shopping with you and you tell them Micky will be there they agree!). But anyway, Micky will suddenly appear on TV, the papers, everywhere and begin saying "Hey kids! Join the Army!" Then he will do a sickeningly cute song/dance and all who see it will run to the nearest recruiting station and sign up like mindless drooling zombies. Which brings us to my next theory.

Theory 2:
You are alone on a misty hillside, all around you the moans of the undead echo about your ears. You raise the sawed off shotgun and fire blindly into the figure ahead of you. It takes the impact in the chest and flies down the rocky hill, but at the bottom it rises again and begins shuffling toward you. You fire again, striking it in the head. This time the grey corpse falls like a rag doll to the earth. Relieved you turn, and are immediately enveloped in the groping hands of several ghouls in front of you! You scream but no one hears and as they pull you in you can feel their broken teeth sinking into your flesh.
This is the world of the future.
Some day soon zombies will rule the earth! It will begin with a small outbreak in Nevada, then will spread throuout america and soon the entire world will be of the living dead! So I say fight back! begin collecting weapons and water now and barricade yourself in your house like I have. The Mouseful Army will not stop the undead! There are refrences to it in the book of Psalms, (chapter 27) and in an ancient Egyptian ledgend (though oddly enough it says nothing at all about mummies, only zombies). So prepare now! Mwahahahahaha!!!!
I must leave now, the men in the white coats are outside. So work hard! Strive to be masculine!Beware the ides of March!

P.S. when barricadeing yourself, try to bring along a few games, you can't clean your guns all day.

Alba Saor!
bOb


*Bob never says "y'all" he simply feels like it, so shut up about it.