raise my hands and sway

Ah it's been far too long since I ranted against the evangelicals. but over this last weekend I went to a "youth retreat" just to see some of my friends. I am currently in rehab. when I got there it seemed okay, people I knew walking around, talking, pelting each other with airsoft guns (a passtime into which i quickly dove) and all was right with the world. i rolled out my sleeping bag into my friend's six person tent and then went back to where I could be with my small group of fellow retards. the boys tents were on a huge hill, surrounded by tall grass. below the hill was the barn where the "teachings" and (shudder) "worship" happened. a few hundred feet away was the house and a little beyond that the girls tents. we didn't do anything especialy fun for a while, just sat and talked about our pitiful lives.
Then it hit like a tital wave. BOOM! explosions of repeated words set to "music" and rebelling-against-theology teaching! for four hours until well past dark! AAAHRG! they all said the prayr of the just, first thing, it went something like this: "Lord, i just wanna praise you, and just, feel your presence and just totaly thank you for that just, totaly awesome thing you did on the cross, and just..." you get the picture. there were so many stupid things they said that i don't have time to tell them all, so let it suffice to say that they didn't have brains.
But after that we were finaly released fronm the bonds of rapture crap to roam free and light fires with gasoline.
once while bored I and a few freinds screamed at the top of our lunges "Joe!" (an acquaintance of mine) "your mommy wants you to kiss her goodnight" and "Joe
! your mommy wants to know if you brought deoderant!" yes it was infintil;e, but fun. after lighting a bon fire and sitting around it for a while, we decided to go to the old lutheran cemetary a block or so down (this all takes place in an unincorperated town) and hang out there for a little while. but as we babbled innanely we heard the sound of people coming, so we hid behind gravestones (mine was someone named Bennet.) and as they got close we jumped out and "zombied" at them. we all stumbled foreward yelling "brains!" grabbed their heads, looked into their ears and pushed them away yelling indignantly "no! brains!" again, infintile but fun. later we were forced into our tents by the stupid goteed councilor dudes and so we sat and talked. all kinds of pointless subvjects came up, from siblings to girlfriends (none of us, even at our age had ever had any) and so the night wore on, with all of us talking and occasionaly slipping out of our tent and into the house for some caffine. and so we stayed up all night, just like I had the night before, which made an even 48 hours (the required number of hours awake for marines).
about six in the morning we met with a female friend of ours and were recruited to wake everyone up for breakfast. So we had fun yelling and shaking tents, especialy with the realy old people. And so in yet another fit of infintileness, while they were stuffing their faces we TP'd everyone on the hill's tent, and the clicky brat girls crapshack.immediately after that I got to go over to a local gun club and shoot my extraordinarily cool shotgun, but missed my chance to throw things at the nazi rally.

did you ever see a llama, kiss a llama on a llama llama's llama taste of llama llama llama duck. (I'm slipping)
-~-Bob